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Today we give you the keys to the Middle Kingdom, in the form of two magical sounds that will amaze

and baffle your conversation partners in turn. Used with judicious moderation, this disyllabic incantation

will let others know you're doing just fine, and there's no problem whatsoever. Used maliciously, it can

buy you enough time for a quick getaway on whatever rustabout Soviet construction equipment happens

to be nearby. Not that we're advocating theft. Seriously.