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We hate to be the bearers of bad news and all, but if you're coming to China for the long-term you are

pretty much guaranteed to get seriously ill. And we mean ill in the call-the-doctor-to-defibrillate-my-lungs

sense of the word. At least until your immune system starts taking this country seriously, life in China will

be a lot like that time you tended bar at that sangria party in college, only without the wine and fruit juice.

Learning Chinese? If you're an absolute beginner to mandarin, join Echo and David for a Chinese lesson

that covers some critical basics of the language. Start listening now and before ten minutes are up you'll

know how to ask and answer questions in Chinese, and be an expert at shunning friends and relatives

who show the slightest signs of potentially contagious infection.